(Da Big Sexy Blog)

Anonymous asked: i was eating poke chops last night and thinkin man hows about i get a little chicken wang up in my crib. I went to the local bar and couldnt get a single buffalo wing to come try some of my spicy sauce...whats a brutha gotta do?

Brotha gotta put his foot down and make yo sexy way back into da kitchen and make ya own damn wingz!  Damn.  Nothin worse than a pack o’ playas takin they sweet time when all u need is a phat wing on yo mouf!  I feel ya brothaman, I feel ya.

tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?

Dis bot be askin’ me another question when I was all fixin’ to eat sum biscuits!  But ok bot, I tell ya here and nah. 

Da first thang I remember while bein’ on dis earff is waking up in a warm and safe, albeit curious situation.  I opened one of the eyes on ma face and thangs were pretty bright and sunny.  Lotsa party animals were surroundin me singin sum Marvin Gaye and eatin’ cornbread and chicken fingers.  Ol’ Grandaddy Jackson be tryin ta pass me a phat piece o cornbread, but, wait!….I can’t move ma arms.  They are still inside this soft thang holdin me.  as the smell of cornbread and the Marvin Gaye songs became more intense, Mama Jackson gave da final push and I WAS BORN!  I didn’t have no teef, but u better believe I sampled dat hospital cornbread. 

PS….It is said that I came out da womb wit a lil bonedaddy TEEHEEHEE Wink!

Nah people always be askin’ me: “Boobdaddy69, if it were your last meal on earth before you finna be buried in the ground under a sexy tombstone, what would u eat for dat last meal?”

Don’t even have ta think bout it, because my answer is obvious:  Last meal would be a KFC seance with Colonel Sanders.

Ya Hur?!?!?!?!?!?!